Life is much easier when you really do something you are capable of, with a smile on your face. People will be impressed to see your performance and will mistaken you are doing very hard work in your work but you know that you are enjoying while having fun because you are doing what you love to do. Hours pass like minutes and still you have that wish do more. This is called right choice baby.
Quick Jokes and funny stuff do the right thing for you baby so here we are going to help you by having the opportunity to let you read our newest collection of latest jokes.
But first let us aware you the endless benefits of having humor. Here are the major points here due to short of time:
1.) No space for boredom
2.) Liked by everyone
3.) Makes you most lovable person
4.) Health and no disease
5.) Double the energy
6.) Tension, oh place at all
A.) A man moves into a colony where people don't wear clothes. He receives a letter from his mom asking him to send her a current photo of himself in his new place. Too embarrassed to let her know that he lives in a that colony, he cuts a photo in half and sends her the top half.
Later he receives another letter asking him to send a picture to his grandmother. The man cuts another picture in half, but accidentally sends the bottom half of the photo. He is really worried when he realizes that he sent the wrong half, but then remembers how bad his grandmother's eyesight is, and hopes she won't notice.
A few weeks later, he receives a letter from his grandmother. It says... "Thank you for the picture. Change your hair style, it makes your nose look too short!"
After so much research, a man finds a book called "How to be the Man in your house". He goes through it and learns. After reading, he sets the book down stands up and says to his wife "From now onwards, my word is law. You will prepare and have ready a gourmet meal for me each evening on my return from work, you will then run me a bath, was my back and dry me off. We shall then make love the what I want to. Oh,and one more thing, guess who will be dressing me from head to toe in the morning", The wife looked up at him and replied " If I'm right it'll be the fkn undertaker"
B.) A guy walks into a pub and sits down next to a hunk with a dog at his feet.
"Does your dog bite?" "No."
A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg.
"I thought you said your dog didn't bite!" the man says indignantly.
"That's not my dog."
C.) “Hi, my name is (your name), and you are... gorgeous!"
D.) “You’re like a dictionary. You add meaning to my life."
E.) “Oops, I think I lost my number. Can I have yours?"
F.) “I’m invisible. Can you see me? How about tomorrow night?"
G.) You: Did it hurt?
Her: Did what hurt?
You: When you fell from Heaven.
H.) Why do we trust the banks with our money, but they don't trust us with their pens?
I.) He who runs in front of a car gets tired, but he who runs behind a car gets exhausted!
j.) you're so short you can sit on the curb and swing your legs.
K.) Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A HANDSOME INTELLIGENT SENSITIVE MAN?
A: A RUMOR.
L.) What does 0 say to 8?
Ans : Nice belt!
Day with Lots of Laughs
Filling your day with lots of laughs is the best way to live you life. It lighten up your heart and makes your mood cool. Benefits are endless. You should never fall in love with sadness and the best option is falling in for fun. As this blog is dedicated to providing the entertainment material, so here we share some of latest and most liked jokes ever.
Here we go:
A Bus full of wives going for a picnic crashed with no survivors.
Each Husband cried for a week.
But one husband continued for more than a month.
When asked he replied miserably... " My wife missed the Bus"
Spouse to Husband (on Phone): Dear, Can you talk for 2 seconds? Hope, you are not busy?
Husband: Yes! Why? What is it?
Wife: I have a Good and Bad news!
Husband: I want to hear only Good news, don't have time for the Bad
Wife: Fine, the Good news is that the Air Bags in our new Range Rower worked perfectly FINE! I reached home safe but car....Ok lets leave bad news..
Boyfriend can to his girl friend: Hello. how are you doing my love!
Girl: perfect sweetheart!
Boy: Can you please spare time to meet me during the weekend at my home alone?
Girl: Ops, I am sorry honey, I can't because I am going to attend my cousin's wedding and the next day I'll be too tired. sorry.
Guy: Ok as you wish but I was just planning to take you out for mall, surprise you with an smartphone, then buy you a new dress and the movie and much more..
Girl: Wow, I will be coming and I may even spend the whole weekend there if you want my love.
Guy: What about the wedding?
Girl: Which wedding, I was joking...
Guy: Me too...
Whats the difference between women and batteries?
Batteries have a positive side!
What's the difference between a normal birthday party, and a bulimic birthday party? At the bulimic birthday party, the cake jumps out of the girl instead of the girl jumping out of the cake.
What's black and white and laughing?
The penguin that pushed the first one.
Here we go:
A Bus full of wives going for a picnic crashed with no survivors.
Each Husband cried for a week.
But one husband continued for more than a month.
When asked he replied miserably... " My wife missed the Bus"
Spouse to Husband (on Phone): Dear, Can you talk for 2 seconds? Hope, you are not busy?
Husband: Yes! Why? What is it?
Wife: I have a Good and Bad news!
Husband: I want to hear only Good news, don't have time for the Bad
Wife: Fine, the Good news is that the Air Bags in our new Range Rower worked perfectly FINE! I reached home safe but car....Ok lets leave bad news..
Boyfriend can to his girl friend: Hello. how are you doing my love!
Girl: perfect sweetheart!
Boy: Can you please spare time to meet me during the weekend at my home alone?
Girl: Ops, I am sorry honey, I can't because I am going to attend my cousin's wedding and the next day I'll be too tired. sorry.
Guy: Ok as you wish but I was just planning to take you out for mall, surprise you with an smartphone, then buy you a new dress and the movie and much more..
Girl: Wow, I will be coming and I may even spend the whole weekend there if you want my love.
Guy: What about the wedding?
Girl: Which wedding, I was joking...
Guy: Me too...
Whats the difference between women and batteries?
Batteries have a positive side!
What's the difference between a normal birthday party, and a bulimic birthday party? At the bulimic birthday party, the cake jumps out of the girl instead of the girl jumping out of the cake.
What's black and white and laughing?
The penguin that pushed the first one.
Every week we add New Jokes and Quotes
"This funny humorous post is invented to add new quotes and jokes instantly as they come new in the market/mind. You can visit check enjoy it now and visit it again to check upcoming fun. So everybody - Get ready to laugh!"
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If hubby is head of the family then what is wife?
Wife is the neck of the family and can turn head anywhere!
Wife: I will not survive. I will be died!
Husband: I will also be died.
Wife: I have fever and going through big pain but why you will die?
Husband: I can not tolerate so big news of happiness.
In psychology class..
Professor has placed a cake and other side female rat.
Rat gone to cake.
Other time, they places bread and female rat. Than again it goes to bread.
Several times, they put different food items but rat never attracted to female rat.
Professor - It is proved that hunger is bigger than love.
One intelligent student: Sir, Will you please once try to replace the female rat? It may possible that existing female is its wife!!
"Basic research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I am doing." - Werner Von Braun
"Instant gratification takes too long." - Carrie Fisher
"It is difficult to keep quiet if you have nothing to say." - Malcolm Margolin
Man: I am very happy with life. Everything is just perfect. No problems, lot of free time and peace of mind.
Doctor: I got your nerve. You have lack of vitamin SHE!
Boys capability of keep balance should be examined when they are making pegs!
Crazies - They distribute it like they are sharing heaven's syrup! Cheers..
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If hubby is head of the family then what is wife?
Wife is the neck of the family and can turn head anywhere!
Wife: I will not survive. I will be died!
Husband: I will also be died.
Wife: I have fever and going through big pain but why you will die?
Husband: I can not tolerate so big news of happiness.
In psychology class..
Professor has placed a cake and other side female rat.
Rat gone to cake.
Other time, they places bread and female rat. Than again it goes to bread.
Several times, they put different food items but rat never attracted to female rat.
Professor - It is proved that hunger is bigger than love.
One intelligent student: Sir, Will you please once try to replace the female rat? It may possible that existing female is its wife!!
"Basic research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I am doing." - Werner Von Braun
"Instant gratification takes too long." - Carrie Fisher
"It is difficult to keep quiet if you have nothing to say." - Malcolm Margolin
Man: I am very happy with life. Everything is just perfect. No problems, lot of free time and peace of mind.
Doctor: I got your nerve. You have lack of vitamin SHE!
Boys capability of keep balance should be examined when they are making pegs!
Crazies - They distribute it like they are sharing heaven's syrup! Cheers..
Lot of Laugh
No intro - because you know what we are going to do, is make you lot of laugh! so get ready..
The person who got married in hurry - has spoiled his life..
So what ! Who has married so calmly has the same results...
People make lot of fun on marriage where husband is only victim. If you are in this category - you can understand the above pun better.
-----
Wife: Will you please give me the news paper,please?
Husband: How backward you are! People have reached to moon... Please take my tablet and use it.
Wife: Taken the table and killed the cockroach with it..
Hubby: Insane!
lNever try to boast anything. First listen to your wife - they are always right. Over smartness kills that is what happens in above joke.
----
Life is visiting card.. Wife is memory card.. Husband is a ATM card..
Girlfriend is a debit card, neighbor is greeting card, sister in law is recharge card.
Parents ate pan card. Brother in law a duplicate card. child is identity card.
But friends are perfect card, works everywhere!
Every relationship is like card so use them wisely and save some good one for lat minute usage.
----
Two biggest lie of the world.
Female: Just getting ready in 2 minutes.
Male: Just coming home in 2 minutes.
World truth - and convert it as a part of humor.
----
After marriage the shy boy got confused on how to start the conversation!
After long silence, he finally asks to his wife: Do your family know that you are going to stay here from tonight onward?
Shyness makes sometime dumbo. So this bridegroom asks a silly question out of fear and makes us smile.
The person who got married in hurry - has spoiled his life..
So what ! Who has married so calmly has the same results...
People make lot of fun on marriage where husband is only victim. If you are in this category - you can understand the above pun better.
-----
Wife: Will you please give me the news paper,please?
Husband: How backward you are! People have reached to moon... Please take my tablet and use it.
Wife: Taken the table and killed the cockroach with it..
Hubby: Insane!
lNever try to boast anything. First listen to your wife - they are always right. Over smartness kills that is what happens in above joke.
----
Life is visiting card.. Wife is memory card.. Husband is a ATM card..
Girlfriend is a debit card, neighbor is greeting card, sister in law is recharge card.
Parents ate pan card. Brother in law a duplicate card. child is identity card.
But friends are perfect card, works everywhere!
Every relationship is like card so use them wisely and save some good one for lat minute usage.
----
Two biggest lie of the world.
Female: Just getting ready in 2 minutes.
Male: Just coming home in 2 minutes.
World truth - and convert it as a part of humor.
----
After marriage the shy boy got confused on how to start the conversation!
After long silence, he finally asks to his wife: Do your family know that you are going to stay here from tonight onward?
Shyness makes sometime dumbo. So this bridegroom asks a silly question out of fear and makes us smile.
Crazy, New but for above 18
Sorry, this time for being late, but better late than never. So here, again, bringing some of the best, crazy, corny, lovely, naughty jokes you ever heard but take care as this time they are for above 18 and have got some comic climax of couples..you know..lol..
So go down, and have fun..
1.) A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a case of beer, any kind except Schlitz. The bartender says, "What's wrong with Schlitz, don't you like it? The man says, "I hate that". Last night I drank a whole case of Schlitz and blew chunks. The bartender says, "You drink a case of any beer you're going to blow chunks". You don't understand said the man, Chunks is my dog.
2.) A blonde walked in on her husband having an affair. She was so angry she pulled out a gun and pointed to the woman's head. She was about to pull the trigger, when her husband said, "No, don't!" and she replied, "Shut up, you're next!"
3.) A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. "You aren't so good in bed either!", he shouted and stormed off to work. By mid morning, he decided he'd better make amends and called home.
"What took you so long to answer?"
"I was in bed."
"What were you doing in bed this late?"
"Getting a second opinion."
4.) Man comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger with his wife. He says, "What the hell are you two doing?" His wife turns to the stranger and says, "I told you he was stupid."
5.) One day a girl was talking to her friend and she said to her, "My boyfriend bought me flowers for my special day this year so I guess I have to put my legs in the air for him.", and her friend replied, "Why? Don't you have a vase?"
6.)Two 4 year boys are standing at the toilet to pee. One says, "Your thing doesn't have any skin on it!".
"I've been circumcised.", the other replied.
"What's that mean?"
"It means they cut the skin off the end."
7.) "How old were you when it was cut off?"
8.) "My mother said I was just 2 days old."
9.) "Did it hurt?", the kid asked inquiringly.
10.) "You bet it hurt, I didn't walk for a year!"
11.) Couple started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 11 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flash light!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past 7 minutes!"
12.) As an Air plane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!
13.) Sincerity is everything. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
14.) His sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!
So go down, and have fun..
1.) A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a case of beer, any kind except Schlitz. The bartender says, "What's wrong with Schlitz, don't you like it? The man says, "I hate that". Last night I drank a whole case of Schlitz and blew chunks. The bartender says, "You drink a case of any beer you're going to blow chunks". You don't understand said the man, Chunks is my dog.
2.) A blonde walked in on her husband having an affair. She was so angry she pulled out a gun and pointed to the woman's head. She was about to pull the trigger, when her husband said, "No, don't!" and she replied, "Shut up, you're next!"
3.) A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. "You aren't so good in bed either!", he shouted and stormed off to work. By mid morning, he decided he'd better make amends and called home.
"What took you so long to answer?"
"I was in bed."
"What were you doing in bed this late?"
"Getting a second opinion."
4.) Man comes home from work, walks into his bedroom, and finds a stranger with his wife. He says, "What the hell are you two doing?" His wife turns to the stranger and says, "I told you he was stupid."
5.) One day a girl was talking to her friend and she said to her, "My boyfriend bought me flowers for my special day this year so I guess I have to put my legs in the air for him.", and her friend replied, "Why? Don't you have a vase?"
6.)Two 4 year boys are standing at the toilet to pee. One says, "Your thing doesn't have any skin on it!".
"I've been circumcised.", the other replied.
"What's that mean?"
"It means they cut the skin off the end."
7.) "How old were you when it was cut off?"
8.) "My mother said I was just 2 days old."
9.) "Did it hurt?", the kid asked inquiringly.
10.) "You bet it hurt, I didn't walk for a year!"
11.) Couple started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 11 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flash light!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past 7 minutes!"
12.) As an Air plane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!
13.) Sincerity is everything. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
14.) His sister was with two men in one night. She could hardly walk after that. Can you imagine? Two dinners!
Sequel of Jokes
Heartiest thanks to all readers for their outstanding response in UK/USA, encouraging/enabling us to write 'Sequel of Jokes' for non-stop entertainment, having more joyful time and ensuring, you live your life having enough laughter with friends and family. This time - our jokes are funny, short, latest, contain more comedy with well timing. You can understand the pranks more clearly and easily because they're now info-graphic. We trust that you all gonna make it as viral as its previous version.
Let us also lime light that bringing this thing into your daily life rally helps to live 100 percent of your time. Humor really gives you lots of hidden benefits like: you get energy, feel more refreshed, remove boredom, come more close to everyone, reduce stress, better blood pressure and much more. We do our best effort to keep it upgraded so that every tie you visit, you find some different, something meaningful, something to have fun with. So get ready for smile and keep exploring/sharing.
Once a man went to a marriage..
as he enters - there were 2 doors - the message was for friend and second relatives.. He enters in friends gate.
Again there were 2 doors - one was for ladies and another was for gents.. He enters in Gents..
Again there were 2 doors - One was for with gifts and another was for without gifts.. So he enters in without gift..
And he reaches on the street with message - shy on you - in my marriage without gift for meal.. huh
-----
Doctor: How your face burnt?
Man: I was ironing my clothes and phone rang and...
Doctor: Aha, but the another side of face burnt as well?
Man: Oh Doctor, these people are very dumb. Someone called again.
---
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. If this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
----
The man wanted to become a great Scientist like Nutone..
after long research - he wrote the forth law of motion.
"Loose motion can never be done in slow motion"
-----
What is the meaning of greet dot on tiger Biscuit..
It means - the Tiger is On line..
-----
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Europe.. Europe who?
No your a poo..Lol
-----
Man called frantically into the phone: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Man shouted: No, this is her husband!
-----
Girl:Are you coming to my party tonight?
Boy:Ops - I am Sorry. I can not be there.
Girl: Why?
Boy: Because, I have to get up REALLY early tomorrow afternoon!
-----
I told him that look at that dead bird!
She looked up at the sky and said..."Where???"
-----
Just imagine, how many miles you have scrolled with mouse wheel.
-----
We teens are always full of energy until they say the words: clean up..
-----
Teacher: Why are you late?
Me: At least I came!
-----
Hahah..
Hey - I didn't fall - This floor just needed a big hug!
----
My grandpa always told, "Don't watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.
-----
A man goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doctor, my brother gone crazy, he thinks he's a chicken." The doctor says, "Why don't you turn him in?" The guy says, "We would. But we need the eggs."
-----
A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 9:30!" he replies: "Why? What happened at 9:30?"
Let us also lime light that bringing this thing into your daily life rally helps to live 100 percent of your time. Humor really gives you lots of hidden benefits like: you get energy, feel more refreshed, remove boredom, come more close to everyone, reduce stress, better blood pressure and much more. We do our best effort to keep it upgraded so that every tie you visit, you find some different, something meaningful, something to have fun with. So get ready for smile and keep exploring/sharing.
Once a man went to a marriage..
as he enters - there were 2 doors - the message was for friend and second relatives.. He enters in friends gate.
Again there were 2 doors - one was for ladies and another was for gents.. He enters in Gents..
Again there were 2 doors - One was for with gifts and another was for without gifts.. So he enters in without gift..
And he reaches on the street with message - shy on you - in my marriage without gift for meal.. huh
-----
Doctor: How your face burnt?
Man: I was ironing my clothes and phone rang and...
Doctor: Aha, but the another side of face burnt as well?
Man: Oh Doctor, these people are very dumb. Someone called again.
---
If this is coffee, please bring me some tea. If this is tea, please bring me some coffee.
----
The man wanted to become a great Scientist like Nutone..
after long research - he wrote the forth law of motion.
"Loose motion can never be done in slow motion"
-----
What is the meaning of greet dot on tiger Biscuit..
It means - the Tiger is On line..
-----
Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Europe.. Europe who?
No your a poo..Lol
-----
Man called frantically into the phone: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!
Doctor: Is this her first child?
Man shouted: No, this is her husband!
-----
Girl:Are you coming to my party tonight?
Boy:Ops - I am Sorry. I can not be there.
Girl: Why?
Boy: Because, I have to get up REALLY early tomorrow afternoon!
-----
I told him that look at that dead bird!
She looked up at the sky and said..."Where???"
-----
Just imagine, how many miles you have scrolled with mouse wheel.
-----
We teens are always full of energy until they say the words: clean up..
-----
Teacher: Why are you late?
Me: At least I came!
-----
Hahah..
Hey - I didn't fall - This floor just needed a big hug!
----
My grandpa always told, "Don't watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.
-----
A man goes to a psychiatrist and says, "Doctor, my brother gone crazy, he thinks he's a chicken." The doctor says, "Why don't you turn him in?" The guy says, "We would. But we need the eggs."
-----
A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells "You should have been here at 9:30!" he replies: "Why? What happened at 9:30?"
Go outside
Man to young guy: Have you ever seen Taj Mahal or Easter Island's Moais,?
boy: No..
Man: Haha, go sometimes to see the world outside!!
Next day: Again, that man asks to same guy - Have you ever seen Pyramids of Giza?
Boy: No..
Man: Lol, go sometimes and see the world outside!
The another day - That man asks to boy - Have you ever seen.. the boy immediately interrupted him asking...
Do you know James?
Man: No
Boy: Lol, go sometimes, see what is happening in your home.. inside..
boy: No..
Man: Haha, go sometimes to see the world outside!!
Next day: Again, that man asks to same guy - Have you ever seen Pyramids of Giza?
Boy: No..
Man: Lol, go sometimes and see the world outside!
The another day - That man asks to boy - Have you ever seen.. the boy immediately interrupted him asking...
Do you know James?
Man: No
Boy: Lol, go sometimes, see what is happening in your home.. inside..
Never Ending Jokes
Somethings like jokes, never ends. There are always millions of things to laugh at. Daily uncountable people get up and start a new chapter of thier lives, and somehow in their daily activities, numberless funny situations arise. People like us just grab those instances and give you a good material have fun or to share with anyone to create a good laughter.
So here, we are here adding some good newest funny pranks to add more value into our never ending journey of entertaining your world.
Wife: Can u help me in the gardening?
Husband: What do u think I am...a gardener?
Wife: Can u fix the door handle?
Husband: What do you think I am... a Carpenter?
Next day, when husband came from work, he saw everything has been fixed.
Husband: Who did all this ?
Wife: Our neighbour.
But he gave me two options.....Either I should give him a burger or a kiss.
Husband: I am sure u must have given him a burger. Wife: What do u think I am.......McDonalds?!!
Boss: Do you take anything seriously?
Employee: Yes..My phone's low battery warning!!
One of stupidest question ever: What is my Nationality?
If 7 out of 12 people suffer from skin injuries does that mean the 5 of them enjoy!
Now, which way should I choose?
To the left, where nothing is right...
OR
To the the right, where nothing’s left?
Either you like me, or you're gone mad!
If they count the speed of light, do they also notice the speed of dark?
Why do ducks have webbed feet?
Simple -- To stamp out fires.
Why do elephants have flat feet?
Well -- To stamp out burning ducks.
Best way to reduce weight!
First turn your neck to the right and then to the left.Repeat this exercise everytime when you're offered something to eat!
Also read these Decent Jokes
So here, we are here adding some good newest funny pranks to add more value into our never ending journey of entertaining your world.
Wife: Can u help me in the gardening?
Husband: What do u think I am...a gardener?
Wife: Can u fix the door handle?
Husband: What do you think I am... a Carpenter?
Next day, when husband came from work, he saw everything has been fixed.
Husband: Who did all this ?
Wife: Our neighbour.
But he gave me two options.....Either I should give him a burger or a kiss.
Husband: I am sure u must have given him a burger. Wife: What do u think I am.......McDonalds?!!
Boss: Do you take anything seriously?
Employee: Yes..My phone's low battery warning!!
One of stupidest question ever: What is my Nationality?
If 7 out of 12 people suffer from skin injuries does that mean the 5 of them enjoy!
Now, which way should I choose?
To the left, where nothing is right...
OR
To the the right, where nothing’s left?
Either you like me, or you're gone mad!
If they count the speed of light, do they also notice the speed of dark?
Why do ducks have webbed feet?
Simple -- To stamp out fires.
Why do elephants have flat feet?
Well -- To stamp out burning ducks.
Best way to reduce weight!
First turn your neck to the right and then to the left.Repeat this exercise everytime when you're offered something to eat!
Also read these Decent Jokes
Love plus....
Love + Care = other
Love + Fear = Dad
Love + Company = Sister
Love + Fight = Brother
Love + Life = Girlfriend
Love + Enjoyment = Frineds
Love + Care + Fear + Fight + Life + Enoyment = Wife
So married life is really easy, it is just like a walk in the park...but the problem is that the park is... 'Jurassic Park'...
Love + Fear = Dad
Love + Company = Sister
Love + Fight = Brother
Love + Life = Girlfriend
Love + Enjoyment = Frineds
Love + Care + Fear + Fight + Life + Enoyment = Wife
So married life is really easy, it is just like a walk in the park...but the problem is that the park is... 'Jurassic Park'...
New in Market
I know you must be fed up from hearing those repeated jokes again and again. Well, do not worry - we are here to update you with fresh ones. We do lot of researches so that you get the newest. Your smile is our target - and we take it very seriously. WE wish you shall be laughing all the time. It gonna make you healthier and attractive personality. Enough - now go below - and read these new in the market.
Wife is house queen..
Does her own things..
Get irritates when given a work.
Gets happy when goes to shopping!
Rat: In a party had 4 glasses of Beer!
Cat: It is party, otherwise you would have dead!
Rat: Run from here..Otherwise people will say that I am beating a female after drink!
Whether you are in love or being beaten by a mosquito - Results will be same..
No sleep whole nigh!!!
Dr: How do you come here?
Patient: Not feeling well!
Dr.: Do you take alcohol?
Patient: Yes, but please make it small!!
Friend: How did you teeth break?
Man: Wife has made so hard breads!
Friend: So you should have denied from eating!!
Man: That is what I did!!!
Compounder: Why do you stare girls while standing here o regular basis?
Man: Because it is written in you notice board - 11 - 1 - time to see females!!
Wife is house queen..
Does her own things..
Get irritates when given a work.
Gets happy when goes to shopping!
Rat: In a party had 4 glasses of Beer!
Cat: It is party, otherwise you would have dead!
Rat: Run from here..Otherwise people will say that I am beating a female after drink!
Whether you are in love or being beaten by a mosquito - Results will be same..
No sleep whole nigh!!!
Dr: How do you come here?
Patient: Not feeling well!
Dr.: Do you take alcohol?
Patient: Yes, but please make it small!!
Friend: How did you teeth break?
Man: Wife has made so hard breads!
Friend: So you should have denied from eating!!
Man: That is what I did!!!
Compounder: Why do you stare girls while standing here o regular basis?
Man: Because it is written in you notice board - 11 - 1 - time to see females!!
09 jokes you can easily share anywhere
Are confused about what to share when you want to make the atmosphere light? Well, here we are coming up with these light, clean and simple Funny Jokes to be shared at this moment, no matters what your audience are!
Here we move:
1) Man standing at ATM machine!
Thief: Get and withdraw all the money and give it to us!
Man: But I do not have ATM!
Thief: Than what are you doing here?
Man: Just to chill myself in their air conditions.
2) World's three vary innocent faces:
A- Sleeping child.
B- The person who is asking to for give some money!
C- Our Friend who is sitting in front of our parent!
3) When did the king die?
In his last war!
4)What is the main reason of divorce?
Marriage!
5) In which state biggest rives flows?
Liquid!
6) When our Prime Minister birth?
On his Birthday!
7)How will you divide 7 mangoes between 10 people?
By making Mango Shake!
8)In whole year, where maximum ice fall?
In Glass of wine!
9) Wife (Angrily): I just can not believe this! You forgot my birth day! How dare you!
Hubby (in very tempting voice): Darling, how can you expect me to remember this day when you never look any older!
Wife: Really, my love?
Hubby: Yes, Honey... (thinking - Thank God, I recall the dialogue at right time, otherwise, I would have dead today)
Nothing is Sure, so instead of waiting for perfect time, why not to en-cash what you have right now! Finding the correct time is very rare. You have create it, and the right time is now, live it and rest will fall on places itself. Use our blog to help you when people say to you: Tell me a joke
Here we move:
1) Man standing at ATM machine!
Thief: Get and withdraw all the money and give it to us!
Man: But I do not have ATM!
Thief: Than what are you doing here?
Man: Just to chill myself in their air conditions.
2) World's three vary innocent faces:
A- Sleeping child.
B- The person who is asking to for give some money!
C- Our Friend who is sitting in front of our parent!
3) When did the king die?
In his last war!
4)What is the main reason of divorce?
Marriage!
5) In which state biggest rives flows?
Liquid!
6) When our Prime Minister birth?
On his Birthday!
7)How will you divide 7 mangoes between 10 people?
By making Mango Shake!
8)In whole year, where maximum ice fall?
In Glass of wine!
9) Wife (Angrily): I just can not believe this! You forgot my birth day! How dare you!
Hubby (in very tempting voice): Darling, how can you expect me to remember this day when you never look any older!
Wife: Really, my love?
Hubby: Yes, Honey... (thinking - Thank God, I recall the dialogue at right time, otherwise, I would have dead today)
Nothing is Sure, so instead of waiting for perfect time, why not to en-cash what you have right now! Finding the correct time is very rare. You have create it, and the right time is now, live it and rest will fall on places itself. Use our blog to help you when people say to you: Tell me a joke
Those Strange Things
Sometimes, unknowingly they say some things, that become a laughing stiock for all of us, so lets limelight those great funny events!
1) Oops, I lost my cell!
It is in your jeans!
Oh hello! Don't go to my family in this regard.
2) I understand your problem, but on the other hand...
You have more fingers!
3) What does that innocent watch do when it feels hungry?
I think it goes back for seconds.
4) Oh please, don't just let your mind wander..
It is far too small to be let out on its own!
5) I didn't like my beard at first, then it grew on me.
6) What happens when chemists die..
They barium!
7) Sometime I get so much anger on you but when make myself chill when I think that you are so naturally funny because your life is a joke!
8) I don't want everything but at-least God can bless me with Good company, Fame & money. intelligent friends, amazing girlfriend and supportive family!
9) Hey, Age is just a number. Yeah, and jail is just a room!
10) Slap yourself if you find 85% of the contacts in your my cell are useless!
11) I feel special when mosquitoes go crazy for me.
12) Just do it. Procrastination: working tomorrow for a better today!
13) In traffic, I horn a lot and get angry on the person who is ahead of me and expect the patience of the person who is behind me!
1) Oops, I lost my cell!
It is in your jeans!
Oh hello! Don't go to my family in this regard.
2) I understand your problem, but on the other hand...
You have more fingers!
3) What does that innocent watch do when it feels hungry?
I think it goes back for seconds.
4) Oh please, don't just let your mind wander..
It is far too small to be let out on its own!
5) I didn't like my beard at first, then it grew on me.
6) What happens when chemists die..
They barium!
7) Sometime I get so much anger on you but when make myself chill when I think that you are so naturally funny because your life is a joke!
8) I don't want everything but at-least God can bless me with Good company, Fame & money. intelligent friends, amazing girlfriend and supportive family!
9) Hey, Age is just a number. Yeah, and jail is just a room!
10) Slap yourself if you find 85% of the contacts in your my cell are useless!
11) I feel special when mosquitoes go crazy for me.
12) Just do it. Procrastination: working tomorrow for a better today!
13) In traffic, I horn a lot and get angry on the person who is ahead of me and expect the patience of the person who is behind me!
Now Walk
Every girls wants a sweet caring loving husband. ..
But I can't be complete every girl's wish. ..sorry!
Married life is so simple, Its just like a walkin the park.!!
BUT the problems is that the Jurassic-park...Jurassic Park... Now walk!
But I can't be complete every girl's wish. ..sorry!
Married life is so simple, Its just like a walkin the park.!!
BUT the problems is that the Jurassic-park...Jurassic Park... Now walk!
Some Craziest Dumbest Statements
When Mr. Romeo tells Miss Juliet that she's fat!
Well, he doesnt always use the internet, but when he does, he shares recipes and inspirational quotes. he is..the most pinteresting man in the world.
Crazy the only reason some people are starving and suffering in the world is because they aren't "so blessed".
Is there any jail just for people that don't break apart kit kats before they eat them.
My friends think that I got Right woman in my life but they don't yet know that she is 'Always Right'!
Well, he doesnt always use the internet, but when he does, he shares recipes and inspirational quotes. he is..the most pinteresting man in the world.
Crazy the only reason some people are starving and suffering in the world is because they aren't "so blessed".
Is there any jail just for people that don't break apart kit kats before they eat them.
My friends think that I got Right woman in my life but they don't yet know that she is 'Always Right'!
2 Doors
Why does a chicken coop only have 2 doors?
Because if it had 4, it would be chicken sedan.
What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Because if it had 4, it would be chicken sedan.
What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
With a Broken Pencil
Why shouldn't you write with a broken pencil?
BECAUSE IT'S POINTLESS!
What did Zero say to number Eight?
sigh
BECAUSE IT'S POINTLESS!
What did Zero say to number Eight?
sigh
Coolest, craziest and simplest
Whether you're sitting idle or busy in any project, you can always spare some minutes to relax your mind and soul. No, no you need not to put any special effort for doing it, because we're giving you some of the coolest, craziest and simplest jokes for this purpose. They are one or two line long so no crack them when you get a chance.
What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Have you heard about the constipated mathematician?
He had to work it out with a pencil.
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "P" is silent.
Where do you find a one legged dog?
Wherever you left it.
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
Which is the most stupid animal living in the jungle?"
"The polar bear."
Q:What's grey?
A: A melted penguin
Why don't seagulls fly over bays?
Because then they would be bagels!
Where did Napoleon keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
In little nazis.
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A-buck-an-ear
I once farted in an elevator, which was wrong on so many levels.
What's green and when you get it stuck between your teeth, you die?
A tractor.
What's white and can't climb trees?
A fridge.
Have you heard about the constipated mathematician?
He had to work it out with a pencil.
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "P" is silent.
Where do you find a one legged dog?
Wherever you left it.
What's red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
Which is the most stupid animal living in the jungle?"
"The polar bear."
Q:What's grey?
A: A melted penguin
Why don't seagulls fly over bays?
Because then they would be bagels!
Where did Napoleon keep his armies?
In his sleevies.
How does Hitler tie his shoes?
In little nazis.
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A-buck-an-ear
I once farted in an elevator, which was wrong on so many levels.
What's green and when you get it stuck between your teeth, you die?
A tractor.
Get a Hole
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
In case they get a hole in one!
Guide to understanding a net addiction on various days:-
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three hours of usenet.
The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.
Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month. Others just go over them.
In case they get a hole in one!
Guide to understanding a net addiction on various days:-
Slow day: didn't have much to do, so spent three hours on usenet.
Busy day: managed to work in three hours of usenet.
Bad day: barely squeezed in three hours of usenet.
The law of heredity is that all undesirable traits come from the other parent.
Some couples go over their budgets very carefully every month. Others just go over them.
Silliest Complaints Ever - You Must Go Through
After receiving strange but eye opening complaint from a user, Microsoft decided not to invest further in computers..
Complaint Date: 1st April - Person Name: I Doubt!
Dear Owner,
I bought a computer for my family but we came across some of the biggest unexpected problems! Kindly have a look.
#1. Near alt, I saw the start button but there is no Stop button.
#2. I also purchased keyboard, mouse, data card, CPU, data cable but there is only one icon which shows 'My computer'. So when you will provide the remaining items?
#3.You also show 'My Network Places'. For heaven's sake, please stop providing 'My secret places' I just do not want to let my spouse know where I go after my office hours.
#4. My kids learned 'Computer Word' now they want to learn 'Computer Sentence' so let us know when you introduce that.
#5. There is a query whether any re-scooter is available in your system? I see 're-cycle' only but U own a scooter.
#6. It is shocking that windows says 'My pictures' but there is not even a single pic of mine. So when will you keep my photos ion that?
#7. There is 'Microsoft Office' what about 'Microsoft Home' because I use system at home only.
#8. You only show my recent documents but I need to check my past documents too!
#9. You placed a 'Find' key but it is not working at all. My kid lost my car's key and I tried a lot to trace it with this 'find' button but it didn't work!
#10. Last but not least.. You tell you name is Gates then why are you selling Window?
Thanks & Regards
Always Concerned Person.
Complaint Date: 1st April - Person Name: I Doubt!
Dear Owner,
I bought a computer for my family but we came across some of the biggest unexpected problems! Kindly have a look.
#1. Near alt, I saw the start button but there is no Stop button.
#2. I also purchased keyboard, mouse, data card, CPU, data cable but there is only one icon which shows 'My computer'. So when you will provide the remaining items?
#3.You also show 'My Network Places'. For heaven's sake, please stop providing 'My secret places' I just do not want to let my spouse know where I go after my office hours.
#4. My kids learned 'Computer Word' now they want to learn 'Computer Sentence' so let us know when you introduce that.
#5. There is a query whether any re-scooter is available in your system? I see 're-cycle' only but U own a scooter.
#6. It is shocking that windows says 'My pictures' but there is not even a single pic of mine. So when will you keep my photos ion that?
#7. There is 'Microsoft Office' what about 'Microsoft Home' because I use system at home only.
#8. You only show my recent documents but I need to check my past documents too!
#9. You placed a 'Find' key but it is not working at all. My kid lost my car's key and I tried a lot to trace it with this 'find' button but it didn't work!
#10. Last but not least.. You tell you name is Gates then why are you selling Window?
Thanks & Regards
Always Concerned Person.
Insult
What if you sleep into something more comfortable? Emhh... Like a coma!
You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified.
Ever you hear that?
What?
That.. that sound of no-one caring!
You seem like a black hole of need.
Don't take me as totally useless - use me for that practice!
90% of majority people live and learn, but 10% like you.. just live!
Does this mean our plans for tonight are off or your girlfriend is joining in?
A good male doesn't just happen. He has to be created by us women.
Are you hot but uncomfortable yet?
A man can sleep around no questions asked, but if a woman makes 19 or 20 mistakes, she's a tramp.
The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.
Women would rather be right than reasonable.
That's the nature of research-you don't know what in hell you're doing.
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
You have an inferiority complex and it is fully justified.
Ever you hear that?
What?
That.. that sound of no-one caring!
You seem like a black hole of need.
Don't take me as totally useless - use me for that practice!
90% of majority people live and learn, but 10% like you.. just live!
Does this mean our plans for tonight are off or your girlfriend is joining in?
A good male doesn't just happen. He has to be created by us women.
Are you hot but uncomfortable yet?
A man can sleep around no questions asked, but if a woman makes 19 or 20 mistakes, she's a tramp.
The supply of good women far exceeds that of the men who deserve them.
Women would rather be right than reasonable.
That's the nature of research-you don't know what in hell you're doing.
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.